HOW TO CREATE A HAVEN AT HOME TO SUPPORT YOUR EMOTIONAL NEEDS

Feeling a little stressed, or emotions getting the better of you?
Then perhaps it’s time to get your space in order!

Having a space that supports all facets of our lifestyle needs is highly 

important when  living a lifestyle of less stress and more ease.

In fact ‘emotional health’ is one of the areas we are highly passionate about here at The Organised Life Project and with much reason so.

Having a messy space can leave us feeling distracted, unmotivated, and frustrated.
It is also known to reduce our productivity and induce a state of stress.

​And just like those dishes that if left unwashed, are still there the next day.
If we are living in an environment that’s constantly chaotic and distracting without taking the time to sit and be in a space of calm then our emotions can do the same.

​Before too long they too can continue to build and mount up, causing emotional distress, impacting our health, home, and more.

The impact of having a space that serves and supports our emotional needs helps to soothe the mind and body, creating a sense of security, stability, acceptance, calm, and comfort.

By creating a space that induces calm helps you to process thoughts, feelings, and emotions and have you gaining greater emotional intelligence whilst further accomodating the emotional needs of the home.

​So today we are sitting down with Robyn Simpson of 'Choose The Tude' to discuss ways in which you can create a haven at home that will help to support both your emotional needs and that of your home.

‘Mess = stress for your brain. It may not seem like a big issue, but simply having a disorganised or messy environment, whether it’s at your desk, in the kitchen or the Little Peeps bedrooms can cause your brain to release cortisol (the stress hormone) to try to cope with messy environments.
That’s when things start to go a little haywire.’
- Says Robyn

‘The topic of emotional and mental stress caused by clutter in a home is a big topic, so I’ll focus on the most common frustration sited by parents to demonstrate how a mess causes stress for your brain, and that’s a messy bedroom.’

Why does something so seemingly unimportant cause stress or anxiety?

On a subconscious emotional level your brain may be interpreting the messy bedroom as disrespectful or even potentially dangerous with tripping hazards so it’s important to you at a values level that the mess is cleaned up.’

At an even deeper level, you may be replaying your childhood patterns and projecting them on your children. If you were constantly nagged or punished by your parents about tidying your room, your neural system remembers that painful experience and will try strategies to avoid it happening for you and your Little Peeps. In doing so you inadvertently are reliving the feelings of anxiety or stress.

There are three very good reasons to help your Little Peeps to keep their rooms tidy at an early age:
​

1. To avoid the dreaded arguments in teen years. A little focus and consistency when they are young will pay big dividends later. 
2. To help them develop their core psychological need for competence by teaching them how to keep things organised and tidy,
3. And autonomy, by allowing them to do it themselves and feel a sense of achievement and pride, inspiring them to do it in future.

By the time they become teenagers, habits are well bedded down and difficult to change. Would you prefer your teenager to be competent, tidy and organised or chaotic, messy and disorganised?

A strategy for creating calm spaces
​
‘We all need a space to feel safe and calm, where we can chill out and relax. The following example is focused on Little Peeps, but is just as applicable to any age.’ She continues

The benefits include:

1. Your calm space becomes an anchor to induce calmness simply because that’s the meaning you have given and experience you have when you are in it.
2. It’s a special, safe space of your own you can go to when you need to relax.
3. You decide who is invited into your calm space.

All of the above are designed to reduce stress and anxiety, increasing calmness and happiness, which are great for a healthy body and mind.

How to create a Calm Space:
I highly recommend creating a haven for your Little Peeps as a chill out zone.
It doesn’t have to be in their bedroom, but I find if you have more than one Little Peep, using an area in their bedroom is a good way to protect their space simply because it’s in their dedicated zone, which subconsciously communicates to others to respect their space.

Creating a chill out zone is pretty simple and doesn’t require a lot of space or things. 

Guidelines:
Let them design it so it has meaning for them and they feel ‘ownership’ of their creation.
It needs to be comfortable. 

Allow them to choose 2-3 things they want to include in their space. It’s not about making a mountain of teddies. The less clutter the better.
Use colour to brighten or soften the mood of the space.

Two really simple ideas you could try:
My daughter created an “oasis of calm” (her words, not mine) using a mosquito net (easily obtainable online) + 1-2 colourful cushions. She swaps soft toys depending on her mood.

A tranquil teepee is super easy to make. Simply purchase a kids teepee (easily available online) + 1-2 cushions or a blanket. 
For adults, use the same principles, but you may want to find a nice, sunlit spot in the house where you can set up a little side table and special chair. 
Or if you enjoy yoga or meditation, find a quiet corner of the home or garden where you can set up a mat, candles or quiet music.
The more elaborate the better. It’s about creating a calm uncluttered space where your body and mind can relax.
She said.


So as you can see by the great take home tips that Robyn has shared, whether its having a quiet space to sit with your favourite book or cuppa, or a spot to undertake a regular morning meditation. 

By creating spaces in your home that welcome a sense of peace and calm are important for a balanced home.

Here are some more things to consider when creating your emotional haven at home;

• What are the needs of your home?

 

• How many family members must you consider whilst setting up your space?

 

• What is your current space like and where would best suit to create that space/s?

 

• How will you be using that space? 

 

• What do you currently have that you could utilise to create a space of calm?

            i.e. CD player & Yoga mat / Essential oils / Tee Pee for kids etc.

• What items might you need to bring into your space to create your haven?

           i.e. storage boxes for different kids activities, to drawers for your journal etc.

I love using what we call ‘Calm Boxes’ in our home which are great for the children to grab when they feel they need some chill time in their day.
​We fill them with their favourite books / mindful colouring activities / and card games etc.

We also have a piano that the children love to use that has huge therapeutic benefits. This along with our fave music playlist works wonders for our home.

So there you have it, some great ways you can start to create a haven at home that will help to serve and support your emotional needs and that of your home. Reducing everyday mess and stress and creating a space of calm and ease in your day.

Want to know how you can support you and your Little Peeps emotional and social development then join Robyn’s email list here https://choosethetude.com/subscribe for personal development tools, resources and ideas for parents and little people and more!

Have a great day and here’s to living a more organised life with less stress and more ease,
​
Nicole x